


So Much Lost

by RileyRooin



Category: The Lord of the Rings RPF
Genre: Angst, M/M, Post-Filming Lord of the Rings (Movies)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-09
Updated: 2016-08-09
Packaged: 2018-08-07 15:40:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7720390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RileyRooin/pseuds/RileyRooin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dom feels like he's lost everything important in his life, but at least he has his Billy...  Right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	So Much Lost

  
There were few things as beautiful as the sight of Billy Boyd clad in nothing but a towel... Perhaps the New Zealand scenery, or the ocean at sunrise, but overall, the sight that stood before Dom was unmatched in its beauty. From the soft hairs covering his chest to the flat plane of his stomach, every inch of his body seemed more beautiful than the last. It took all of Dom’s self restraint not to reach out, pull the towel off and-

Of course, he wasn’t supposed to think like that. He and Billy were “just mates.” Billy was dating Ali, and anything the two of them may have had at one point meant nothing anymore. Once she came into the picture, well, Dom had been pretty much forgotten. He and Billy had never discussed it, but it was understood that things were finished. They were friends; that was all. This fact made Dom feel incredibly alone.

Dom realized with a start that Billy was talking to him. He raised his eyes from Billy’s abdomen. “Sorry, Bills, what?”

Billy smiled, green eyes crinkling at the corners. “My bathroom bag, it’s by your feet. Can you give it to me?” He pointed at a small leather bag resting on the floor next to Dom’s legs.

“Oh, sure,” Dom said coolly, and tossed it to him. Billy didn’t meet his eyes as he turned away.

To be honest, it wasn’t just the situation with Billy that made Dom feel alone. Acting-wise, nothing seemed to fulfill him the way _Lord of the Rings_ had. While filming in New Zealand, he’d felt a sense of purpose that he hadn’t been able to find in any other job since. That was part of the reason he was there at that moment. It wasn’t so much that he enjoyed the convention part of it; rather, the interactions with the fans helped him regain a little piece of his _Rings_ experience. As long as they loved him as Merry, he could hold onto his memories.

The other reason he was there was disappearing into the bathroom, bag in hand. Lately, Dom had found himself clinging desperately to anything Billy offered him. The way he saw it, he’d already lost so much of Billy that whatever he could get from the Scot would have to suffice. He’d lost the physical first, then the love, and slowly, he felt himself losing his grip on their friendship, too.

Absent-mindedly, he flipped through the television stations. He wasn’t really paying much attention the to screen. His attention was focused instead on the sounds coming from the bathroom. He could just make out the sound of Billy singing in the shower. Dom got to his feet and approached the door in order to hear better. Even in this casual setting, Billy’s voice sounded beautiful. He stood rooted to the spot, hand outstretched, wanting to open the door, but knowing he couldn’t. Defeated, he retreated back to the bed to stare, unseeing, at the television screen.

\------------

Later, in the privacy of the shower, Dom’s eyes fluttered shut and his hand automatically dropped down to waist level. He tossed his head back, letting the hot water attack his face. He tried to deny the images that were invading his mind: the way the water had dripped from Billy’s wet hair into his face, his towel hanging low around his hips, the soft curve of Billy’s lips when he smiled at Dom. Unable to resist any longer, Dom took a hold of himself. With a low groan, he began to move his hand. He knew he shouldn’t be doing this when all that separated him from Billy was the thin hotel wall, yet he couldn’t help it. He bit down hard on his free hand to keep from moaning Billy’s name.

“Need a hand?”

Dom’s eyes flew open, hands falling to his sides. Billy’s head was peeking around the curtain. Dom blinked a few times to be sure he was seeing what he thought he was. Billy wiggled his eyebrows at him.

“Well, do you?” Without waiting for an answer, Billy shed his towel and joined Dom in the shower.

“Billy, what are you-”

“Shh...” Billy stepped forward, pressing his index finger against Dom’s lips. “Now, you didn’t really think I’d come all this way just for some convention, did you?” He smiled as his eyes flickered down Dom’s body momentarily. When he returned his gaze to Dom’s face, he spoke again. “Oh, Dommeh, it’s been too long...” He murmured these words in a low voice that sent a shiver down Dom’s back. “C’mere.”

Obediently, Dom moved closer to the older man. Billy chuckled and leaned in. His lips found Dom’s earlobe and began to gently kiss him. Dom resisted the urge to move his hips forward to feel some much needed contact. “I’m gonna make you cum, Dommeh. Then, while you’re still floating, I’m going to fuck you,” Billy growled, his breath warm against Dom’s ear. Dom’s felt his cock twitch in response to Billy’s words. “Do you want that, Dom? Hmm?”

Clearing his throat, Dom managed to squeak out a tiny “Yes.”

“Mmm,” Billy murmured and without warning, suddenly gripped Dom’s cock. Dom gasped at this sudden contact. Billy squeezed it gently as he moved his mouth down to Dom’s neck. Ever so softly, his hand began to move up and down Dom’s length. As he did so, his own erection shifted and poked Dom in the thigh. Unintentionally, Dom jumped and jerked his hips forward, yearning for more.

“Impatient lad, aren’t ye?” Billy growled, pulling his hand away. He pushed Dom forcefully against the tiled wall. Only then did he let his mouth finally meet Dom’s. As he devoured Dom’s mouth with his own, he resumed his painfully slow stroking. Dom stood still as long as he could, but before long he found himself whimpering and thrusting forward again, urging Billy to give him more and faster.

Billy pulled his mouth away and spoke in Dom’s ear again. “Tsk, tsk, Dommeh. Don’t you know that good things _come_ -” he squeezed his hand to accentuate this point, “-to those who wait?” Dom was only able to mutter something unintelligible in reply as his eyes fell shut again. Billy fused his mouth to Dom’s and began to move his hand again. It had been months since they’d been together like this, yet Billy still knew exactly what to do to drive him crazy. His hand moved deliberately slow, bringing Dom ever closer to the edge, then he stopped suddenly. He pulled his hand away. Dom’s eyes flew open.

“Well, mate, I’m tried, so I’ll think I’ll turn in for the night,” Billy yawned theatrically and turned away.

“Wait- What?” Dom stuttered, reaching for his arm.

Billy turned to face him again, smiling innocently. “Problem?”

“You fucking cock tease!” Dom snarled, frantic with desire.

“What, do you want something more?”

“Yes!”

“What do you want, Dommeh?” These words were spoken in a guttural voice. Before Dom could answer, he watched as Billy lowered himself to his knees. He shuffled forward, mouth now mere inches from Dom’s straining cock. Dom stared down at him, mesmerized as Billy’s tongue snaked out from between his beautiful lips. It inched forward, until at last, it connected with Dom’s flesh. Billy began to trace small circles around the tip. He paused to speak again, “Is this what you want, Dommeh?” Once again, without waiting for an answer, Billy returned his attention to Dom’s body. In one fluid movement, he opened his mouth and plunged his head forward, engulfing Dom in hot, wet, slickness. Dom’s head fell backwards against the wall as Billy hollowed out his cheeks, making that slickness feel even tighter. Dom shivered again, knowing he wouldn’t last long if Billy kept this up.

Sure enough, the rhythmic bobbing of Billy’s head combined with the dance his tongue was doing were enough to bring Dom close to orgasm. He reached a hand up and gripped at the back of Billy’s head.

“Jesus, Billy, I’m going to fucking cum,” he groaned and arched his back, trying to push himself deeper into the older man’s wet, hot mouth. “Don’t you fucking stop.”

This time, however, Billy seemed to have no intention of stopping. He allowed Dom to guide his movements, and (though Dom didn’t think it was possible) somehow managed to make his mouth feel even tighter. Dom thrust forward eagerly, now perilously close. He pushed himself forward once... twice... and then shuddered as he exploded into the back of Billy’s throat.

He shuddered one last time as Billy pulled his mouth away, then felt his knees turn to jelly. He slid down the wall, turning his face towards the now lukewarm water. He allowed it to fall into his eyes as his breath slowed. “Billy, that was fucking incredible,” he whispered. When Billy didn’t answer, Dom turned to look at him.

The shower was empty.

“Wha-?” Dom asked. He struggled to his feet and peeked around the side of the curtain. The bathroom was filled with steam, but otherwise was also entirely empty. “What the Hell is going on?” Dom quickly got out of the shower. After drying off, he walked out of the bathroom. The hotel room was dark, yet the light from the bathroom offered enough light for Dom to see Billy’s body curled up on his bed. Confused, Dom approached the bed. He flipped on the light, but Billy didn’t stir. His hair was basically dry, his mouth was open slightly and he was snoring as he slept.

Dom frowned. Had that all been just a fantasy? Surely he hadn’t imagined it... Something that felt _that good_ couldn’t be fake. Could it? He had to know.

He placed a hand on Billy’s shoulder and gently shook him. It took a few tries, but soon Billy’s eyes blinked open groggily. He squinted against the light and looked up at Dom. “Dom?”

“Sorry to wake you, Bills; I just wondered...” He paused, feeling foolish, but plunged ahead nevertheless. “Did-did you come into the bathroom while I was in there?”

Billy lifted his head and blinked a few times. “Hmm? No. Been sleeping...” He yawned and let his head drop back on the pillow again. He shut his eyes.

Dom stood above him, studying his face for a moment. Apparently, it _had_ been just a fantasy. He was holding on to something that would never be true again. Like his time as Merry, his relationship with Billy had ended long ago.

He quickly pulled on a pair of boxer shorts and slid into the other bed. He reached for the light switch between the beds and froze, watching Billy sleep. As if he felt Dom’s eyes on him, he rolled over, turning away from him. As he did so, he mumbled, “Ali, can you turn that light off? Trying to sleep, love.”

Swallowing hard, Dom flipped the light off. He burrowed far under the blankets, heart pounding in his chest. It was only then that he let the silent tears wet his pillow.  


* * *

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This was written for the Inspiration v.2 challenge on LiveJournal.
> 
> My quotation: _It is the curl of Helen's hair I am afraid for, that she cut from her own head and said I must keep, while she still loved me. I am only afraid of losing that - for God knows! I've lost so much of her already. (Sarah Waters - Affinity)_
> 
> (Originally published 2004-06-07)


End file.
